you left, and everyone left.
and stuffys left.
now he's gone too.


idk anymore.
feel so.. frustrated or smth.
i cant tell.
the kind of frustration whereby even think about it makes me cry at once.
true that there were great memories.
but hey, what about the pain.
i dont understand.
dont understand why you had to like do that to me 2 years back.
and make me love that day, giving me a reason to love it becos of you.
and why'd you have to crash it again?
it doesnt feel good at all.
i feel so crushed.
really regret spending so much time planning and everything.
working for you, just to make you happy.
i took half a year.
that's like 1/33 part of my life back then.
not like i want to gain some appreciation.
you could've at least say smth.
all you took was 5 seconds, to destroy me.
i took 6 months, all you said was you didnt have time.
i wished i said that too.

insensitive.


crying during the entire long bus ride, is not cool.

last day of work today.
felt kinda emotional.
dont think it was in relation to working, at least not at first.
rather busy today.
i didnt even get the time to go for a break, but oh well.
when it was time to leave, i couldnt bear to.
wanted to say bye to rum, but she was in a convo with stan.
so i waited for like one hour.
and she told me to leave, she was like pissed.
and i felt kinda sad and really sorry.
i dont know.
i asked, wont you miss me?
and she told me i broke my promise.
earlier this year, we promised that she'd keep me.
and every holiday i would return to help her out.
im sorry rum, i didnt mean to.
i felt so bad.
and the girl with the high ego broke down in the bus.
was awkward. very.
but i couldnt hold it any longer.


im really sorry for everything.
im such a damn loser.
and a bitch, like that girl said.
im stupid.