wow i'm back
like after 5 months
i know, i'm sorry.

and idk if it's supposed to like this..
but everytime i come back here after months and start reading my old posts,
i feel so damn stupid for typing all that rubbish


all the damn rubbish in my head.
weird girl with so much hatred and anger from the past aye?
well, it's going to be over.
it's going to be different

my priorities shifted, unnecessary hatred gone with the wind~
easier said than done.
times where sheer joy is within my gasp,
i really hate the feeling of happiness sometimes i swear.

so glad i've been able to get through this ordeal within a short period of time i must say
SHORT haha. long enough for stupid me to be shaken up, literally.
really thank him for being ever there,  even when he's not supposed to :')
although i can be quite a nuisance sometimes and i should grow up
but no i don't want to grow up. i'll be 20 next year (wth?!)

so much has happened through the months
like hmmm.. final semester now. (WOW)
and the "backpacking" trip in Australia's done. (checcckk)
:( time flies
oh glorious victoria~~~


Australia was too damn good and really an eye opener for a suaku like me
especially after being there for an entire month,
i sure did get to experience the "greener side of the grass" (HAHA)
was so damn good. the weather and food and people
any country's weather's better than singapore please


but anyways, sometimes i really wished i'd never feel alone
like that really badass feeling of loneliness never fails to sting
and that mini devil of mine.
some mini devil deep down aye
never fails to bring that demon of insecurity
always getting the better of me. WHY


i just can't wait for exams to be over.
i need the getaway so bad.
so near yet so far, pfft.
so here's xiyu crawling back into her hole of shame and going to bed.
only know you've been high when you're feeling low, right?


good-bye, almost lover.